Au Fait

Structure the environment and you control the plurality of people living within. Dutifully pick up, palm dog ordure, and dispose of properly. Pat yourself on the back, receive warm glances, unwritten praises from neighbors. When your hound squats in public to banish a load of feces, wait attentively amid onlookers in anticipation of gathering up a strategic ration of dung with a sheltered hand; casting the muck into an olive-colored ampule. Well done! Your impulsive mongrel did its part as a rank member of the canine group and so did you as a sage follower of bright human society. Of course, a true gentleman would—out of sympathy—volunteer to clean up after a lady’s pooch, sparing the mademoiselle open shame. Reaping a cur’s sludge in today’s milieu is a “no brainer.”

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