Generations ago, Christ-mass transcended the profligate realm of the Roman Catholic Church. Annexed by the squandering demesne of the United States in 1885, it remains a federal holy day. By endorsement, bureaucratic wunderkinds liberalized indulgences aimed at a wanting hoi polloi.

Etiquette is essential to any sober practice, and we shall develop over some subtle points to leave off solecisms. First, we will fit into place the mortal angels, or benefactors.

Leverage handpicked artifacts {presents if you wish} from venders of renown, such as Walmart, Costco, or Walgreens.

Adorn the work of art with wispy fragments of garish paper.

Billboard the relic with a placard, implicating the liable factor and identifying the influence to be glorified.

Place the prime produce underneath the obligatory Christ-mass tree; admonish the prehensile heirs not to open until the time appointed, thus leaving them in tenterhooks.

Finally, when that long-awaited day arrives, transfer the high-grade amenity to the covetous payee ‘in the limelight’ to maximize visibility and gravity.

Now, a few solicitous words towards the worldly seraphs, or beneficiaries

Rejoice upon receipt of the historical object by layering devotions on the expectant benefactor, halting just shy of deification; keeping with decorum.

Employ all manner of hyperbolic veneration and affected histrionics to soothe the savage breast of say-so onlookers.

The ceremony thus culminates with approving glances and banal utterances from a clique of feted collaborators.

Adherence to these central guidelines serves to fortify communal experience of Christ-mass hysteria favored by aces and certified by amateurs.

This Roman Catholic invention presents as a time of altruistic giving. As invariably, however, beneath visible principle lies invisible purpose. True intent lurks behind a crafty facade constructed by deceitful human beings, rooted in corruption emanating from indwelling sin. Fallen creatures will persist in feigning innocence outside of the graces of the one living God.

The provenance of this carnalval lends circumspection of its essence. A person keeping an applied knowledge of doctrine may consider an association with the Day of Atonement, or Holy of Holies. Annually, the high priest, with bells affixed to his garb, entered the Inner Shrine of the Tabernacle with an overture to God for the reparation of the people. Upon exiting the refuge, the ringing of the chimes signified God’s acceptance and celebrations ensued.

Per annum is Christmas Day {Day of Atonement}. Concurrently, man {high priest} will enter a retail shop {shrine} offering money {blood} in exchange for an artifact {blessing} which he presents to others, signifying redemption. Should one take one’s lifeblood, purchase a blessing and give it to another {precisely when instructed to do so by some mere mortals} it reinforces the credulous notion that one is essentially a good person, far removed from the assertion of the biblical doctrine of man’s being since the fall.

An obscene, warped counterfeit, not surprising when one examines the source. Lends an atypical outlook to the Christmas Tree, the song ‘Jingle Bells’ and so many other contrivances foisted upon the whirld by Catholicism.

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